You know those moments when you feel yourself leveling up? I had one this week when I trusted my voice and went against a deep-rooted belief system I had,
The belief that “I always finish what I start”.
You see, I had planned to host an event talking all about finding and trusting your voice but two days before, I decided to cancel it.
I had everything set up for the virtual event, all I had left to do was host it except, that didn’t interest me anymore.
You might have had instances where every bone in your body was telling you not to go ahead but you ignored those voices. After all, you had already committed, how would it look if you cancelled it? It’s one thing to cancel something before you’ve even started but when you’ve already put the time and effort in, it becomes much harder to step away.
When I added this particular event in my calendar months prior, it never occurred to me to ask myself whether or not I actually wanted to do it. Had I done that, there’s a chance I’d realize it was something I felt I was supposed to do.
1. Get quiet.
Check in with your intuition, that voice is always right. If it’s ever wrong, that’s you going against what you’ve heard. The best way to hear the message is to mute the noise of other people’s opinions and expectations. You’re the one most affected by your choices which means that your voice is the most important opinion out there. It always gets the final say. It may go against what other people believe and that’s completely fine, you’re doing what works best for you.
I officially made the decision to cancel when on a call with a couple of coach friends. They held space for me, asked thought-provoking questions and allowed me to talk through my thoughts and feelings. With that space, I heard my voice loud and clear.
2. Find your people.
Surround yourself with family, friends, coaches and healthcare professionals who encourage you to listen to your being. Spend time with those who actively listen to what you have to say rather than tell you what to do. Your voice and wisdom are enough to guide you – always. Trust that you have all you need to find the answers you’re looking for.
3. Find where you derive your worth.
Is your worth based on what you do and can do for others or is it based on who you are? If your worth is based on what you do, it’s out of reach until you achieve that goal. Then when you finally accomplish it, your worth becomes attached to the next endeavour you still have to achieve. When you derive your worth from who you are though, a gorgeous human being, that encourages you to be in the moment and focus on being the best version of yourself.
With the belief that “I always finish what I start”, I was saying that I was worthy so long as I saw my next project to completion. It was a fleeting, never-ending cycle of being worthy as quickly as I was unworthy.
There will be stubborn pieces of your belief system that stick around longer than you’d like them to. Even the narratives you think you’ve dealt with may spring back up in another way which is completely normal.
4. Know what your opinion is.
Know what your opinion is on a particular subject separate from the opinions of others. Give yourself permission to have your own perspective. Do your research, ask the necessary questions but avoid using someone else’s opinion of something to dictate your next move. This will fuel your self-doubt and reinforce the lie that you’re unable to arrive at an answer on your own. You get to speak for yourself so know the reason why you believe what you believe.
5. It will be scary.
I felt a lot of fear going against a life-long belief system. I was entering into new territory and one that actually served my well-being. But I did it anyway.
The right decisions for you to make won’t necessarily be the easiest ones to make. As a matter of fact, they may be the most uncomfortable decisions you’ll ever make because you’re trading in your comfort zone for growth. By doing this however, you stand in and own your power.
6. Keep your energy levels up
This one decision to fully embody the bold and unapologetic version of myself took my growth to another level. I now have another piece of evidence to prove to myself (and myself alone) that I can do hard things. I showed myself that I deserve to be treated with compassion and I don’t have to do what other people expect of me.
You’re the only person you will always be accountable to. When you’re in good shape and have the energy to do the things you genuinely want to do, you show up better for yourself. You also show up well for your people. If you do the things you should do, your energy levels deplete quickly and leave you in a scarcity mindset. There are little ways you can improve your energy levels that I list in this free download, however, a long-term solution is to trust that the message you get from your intuition will always be enough to guide you.
Your voice is the most powerful tool you have so handle it with care. Believe in it and practice these 6 ways to find and trust your voice. Lean into the messages you receive from within and own your power.