These past 10 years had a lot more in store for me than I anticipated. I started it in my sophomore year of high school and leaving it in my mid-20s. It feels like nothing has changed while everything has at the same time. I don’t know what the 2020 decade has in store for me but I’m taking the 10 lessons I learned in the 2010 decade to get me through. They taught me:
1. Plans change. Often.
Be prepared to be flexible. Things are bound to go a different way than you planned at some point. The one thing you do have control is how you think and act. In those moments, resistance makes it worse, which makes the next best option to pivot and find an alternative. There are multiple ways for you to arrive at the same, or an even better outcome.
2. Be resilient.
Resilience is the best lesson university taught me. When I got a bad grade or didn’t want to study, I knew I had to keep pushing forward if I wanted to graduate. It is one of the most valuable abilities you could have. As natural problem solvers. Our mind is wired to be in constant search for problems, the more stamina we have to mentally and emotionally cope with solving challenges, the more likely we are to thrive.
3. Be courageous.
Ever notice how risk-takers have a really good outlook on life? Now they don’t always makes the wisest decisions but they live. They feel the fear and do it anyway. They know that there will be pain and adversity and they keep going because the lessons learnt along the way make them who they are. Deeper than taking risks, being courageous means showing vulnerability when the critiques and opinions get laid on in full force.
4. Failing is necessary.
Failure is on the same path as success, it just appears a bit sooner. You learn about what works and what needs to be improved on. You build strength, endurance, patience, courage as you consistently get back up. All of the challenges you face in achieving your goals actually prep you for the next step. Though they are painful, the truth is, we learn better from our mistakes.
5. Your person is out there.
There’s no need to settle. Work on yourself. What do you value? What do you stand for? Who are you? Figure of all that out. Don’t wait around for anyone. It’s true when they say love finds you when you least expect it. So don’t be expectant! Do you. Disclaimer: It’s not going to be a walk in the park and it may take several tries, lots of hard work and dedication.
6. The comparison trap will steal your joy.
Everyone has their own lane. Not enough people stay in it. Even if you’re coming from the same family or a similar start, you have your own lane to stay in and that person also has their own. There’s absolutely no need for you to get up in other people’s business and see what they’re doing. All that does is take away from the resources you have to spend on improving yourself. It makes you miserable, sad and jealous none of which are useful. There’s enough for everyone. We are all here to thrive.
7. Google it.
Having issues with your laptop? Need some room decor inspiration? Want to self-publish your book? My girl, just Google it. There’s someone who’s done it already and put it on the internet. The one thing Google can not do is find a medical diagnosis or treatment, go to your doctor for that.
8. Practice gratitude.
It’s hard to complain about scarcity when all you see is abundance. In the smallest of things, watching the sunset or the bigger ones, grateful for someone whose made a positive impact on your life. Visualize a feast in your mind’s eye, no famine.
9. Don’t stay trapped in your comfort zone.
Get uncomfortable as often as possible. Push the envelope. Venture out into new unchartered territory. I think the best challenges and rewards are found when we explore the unknown. It comes with its fair share of risk and obstacles but girl, is it ever worth it! Just to be able to show yourself that you can stretch, and you are resilient and adaptable will take you farther than you thought possible.
That is my word for 2020. I know that I’ve spent years of my life simply thinking about what I should do, could do, ought to do, would like to do, want to do and never actually doing it. *sigh* I’m guilty of staying in the research and development phase, always finding a reason as to why I wasn’t ready to take the plunge. And now, I’m just annoyed. Everyday I spend not starting is a day that I’ve made it harder to get out of that loop. When you take action, you get out of your head and see how it all works in real life (versus the perfect world in our heads). Everytime you take action, you get closer to living the life you want.
I’ve only scratched the surface of all I’ve still to experience but I know that the 10 lessons I learned in the 2010 decade has prepped me for the future.
What are 2 lessons the 2010s taught you? Tell me in the comments below!